this is a short story I've been considering for a while. I'm going to see if I can make a cogniscent, compelling story even if I tell it differently. This one needs a lot of work. I'm trying to tell it with the character narrating his own story, I narrated parts of it differently for the sake of making a draft. apparently I only write sad stories.

SAVED

I walk out of the pub. Maybe I would have been better off staying in tonight. I'm not that drunk, but I should probably walk. I release a big drunken sigh. It's kind of cold-

"Yeah, (I) left jacket in the car!" With smug satisfaction over the small victory I open the door and retrieve it; a gift from somewhere down the line... I can't really remember right now. Oh, it's this one. It's kind of small. I guess I can't bitch if I'm cold.

I put the jacket on one arm at a time, but I have a little trouble with the second so I draw three or four circles inside the liner until it pops in. Tequila, I thought we were friends!

"heehee... I'm dumb." I walk. Some of my steps appear to be straighter than others, but as long as one foot follows the previous I'll make it there. Or maybe I won't and it's the same thing. I don't really have any self-affirming feelings to contradict my thought. Is there anything left? Faith? Hope? Love?

"Fuck". There is nothing. What do I have to show for it all. Failure! "I'm nothin' but'is fuggin' shhhit! ... what the fuck are you looking at?" The dog wimpers at me. Even he pities me too much to be a dog and bark at me. "Get'way!"

I run to chase it away. It runs and I run. I'm tired and I lean against a large bench. I empty my stomach violently for the next minute or so. As my vision and consciousness wain, I struggle to remain standing. I'm crying inwardly, and I become aware of a tear or two are on my cheaks. I wipe them and my mouth. This park is dangerous at night. I'm not afraid. Do I really have no will left?

The resounding thunder split my thought with absolute fear. Once to split everything that moment possesed in my mind. Twice and I am too struck to know I'm reacting. Until I'm there. She's hurt. She's shot. "Fuck me!"

I watch her place her hands over the bloodstained portion of her shirt with a grace and calm I've never seen. I move closer too help. "Are you ok!" I speak through terrified gasps.

"I-" she looks like she's thinking. "It is ok." her voice warmed me like my mother used when she explained things I didn't understand in ways that I could. She looked into my eyes and I could feel my pages being turned as she read me. I should run and get help. "Please, just stay here. It is going to be ok." she assured me.

How can it be ok? you're going to die here! "You're going to be fine." my voice sounded more like a question than it ever could have a sentence. I eased into a position to hold her upright and hold pressure to her wounds. Her complete aura of calmness eased me and I knew that she knew what was happening. She would die. She had no fear of death, but this lack of fear wasn't like me. It was a faith so strong that she knew in her heart it would be ok.

When the knowledge must have struck my face she mused, "I always dreamed I would die in the arms of my one true love, and that his love would make leaving this world less painful." I watched a tear fall now across a cheak, and down to the corner of her shaking lip. Her eyes closed. She can't leave like this. Please!

"I love you." I said with a strength I have never posessed before this moment. I love her? I do love her. It happened in that moment. All of the rules fell by the side and my heart opens truely to just love. I feel love in a way I didn't know exists. "I love you" I whispered as I watched my love losing blood in my arms.

She pulled me close and kissed the tear from my cheak and she smiled at me. Not the kind of smile you might see if she were humoring a child. Her smile is truely happiness. "Then you saved me." She passed.

I watch her face... I'm crying. I'm crying like the word was invented for people trying to immitate what I'm doing. Sobs pull me forward and backward. I hiccup, gasp, and my lungs burn. I'm cryinga tear for everything that has ever failed. It's much too quiet now. My head is clear.

I look up towards the night sky. I'm looking up towards heaven. "No, you saved me... You..."

Beer pong is the sport of kings. I don't care if that's accurate or not, because I'll believe it forever. The only problem with it is that everyone plays the game differently, and everytime you go to someone else's house you have to play by their rules... sucks.

I know that our group plays by a very different set of rules as far as rebuttle is concerned, but we need to have a certain standard of rules anyway. It's too difficult to memorize 20985320985 different sets of rules for the same game.

Here is the set of rules I like to play by because it's simple, fair for skill, and efficient.

If both players make the same cup they will get balls back. if both players make the same cup the opponents will drink three cups and the shooting team gets balls back. A lot of people hate this rule, but it takes skill to do this.

A bounce shot is worth two cups, but it may be blocked. Blocking a normal shot is a penalty of one cup. These rules stack with the first. For example, if you bounce it into the same cup the first player made it is four cups and balls back. If you somehow manage to bounce both into the same cup and the other team doesn't stop it from happening somehow it would be a five cup move. I've never seen this before, but damn.

If you make three shots in a row in consecutive turns or balls back shots you are considered on fire. You may now shoot until you miss.

Reracks are given after six cups remain. we usually do three per game. The first one can't be called until six cups. Since we give the option to use them at any cup value after six we end up with some classic racks such as "the cock and balls", or "stoplight". This rule I would say should be changed to more standard rules, but I like it.

Rebuttle. Here is where I'm certain we differ from everyone else who's ever played the game. We keep it directly number oriented to make it easier to determine. When all of your cups count as hit you get a rebuttle turn. If you had one cup remaining and one opponent hits it, you are now at zero cups. One member of your team must make it to put you back at one cup. Now let's get tricky. Let's say you have two cups remaining and the other team makes same cup. You are now at negative one cup. You and your partner must both make a cup to bring your total up to plus one. If succesful you drink one cup. If your team made same cup you would be at plus two so you can keep your cups. Your total may never exceed the cups you have remaining, this means if you get to a plus two and have only one cup remaining the other team must drink one.

This is your turn. the opponents now get their next turn and play continues as normal. The only difference is that you only get one rebuttle per game. If you hit zero cups again you lose. I know a lot of people don't agree with all of this, but in the event one game leans too quickly it balances it out letting the better team show more consistantly.

Damn. I just realized that I'm just as bad as every douche-nozzle that forced me to lose a game due to weird fucking rules.

I need a new beerpong partner.

I know, the serious discussions of my life are making you jealous right now, but it's true.

beerpong became our favored past time about 3 years ago. I've probably averaged at least one game a week since then. I remember the simpler times when everyone would randomly team up and play random friends and random passers-through to mike holman's old apartment. those were the days.

what must have been almost since the beginning I found my first serious beerpong partner. fat nick(who is now 60 pounds lighter and is still called fat nick for the sake of consistency). we even made a team name(or rather he made the name and I begrudgingly went along with it). we are the fat kid connection(begrudgingness!), of FKC for short. we had never really had a serious streak of more than 4 or 5 games in a row, but our average was fantastic. we made a good team. but we stopped playing partners as much and now that he's on psych drugs he can't drink anymore. so no more FKC except on the rare occasion I agree to drink all of the beers(and we usually still win).

1 year and 6 months ago I found my greatest beerpong partner yet. it was yin and yang. it was ping and pong. it was magic. we started on new years eve and won about 6 games in a row. that was not a bad average at all. we then accompanied a new friend to her group's side of town for a kegger. no one was playing beerpong so we hopped up to show them how it was done. and we did. I forget the original counts now, but I'm pretty sure we won 16 games in a row that night. the keg was empty. I just remember(in the blur of excessive beers and the captain morgan side drinks) the point in time where the entire party was standing on the other side of the table from us talking shit, yelling, telling us we were going down, and looking over and seeing soto laughing just as hard as I was. "hey, j-rizzle, can you make that cup?" there were usually a few cups. "this one?" and I'd sink it. it was like his level of skill upped my own game. then he'd be all, "that's the one, now watch." he'd sink the same cup. that whole party hated the fact that two guys they didn't know came in and beat everyone they did know in different combinations.

soto and I made a trip to chicago with a few other friends and won several more hotel games including one with a circle of death(it's an optional rule that we play by to make games go faster. ask me if you want to know about it). eventually, as all great things do, it ended. the streak I mean. we went from 2 different time zones, 4 or 5 different parties and who knows how much beer before we finally lost a game. I think our first loss came at a team record of 36-0. things got shaky after that. we were still good and I seen fewer teams as skilled, but we ended about 45-12. that's a lot of beer for a 4 month period of games. anywhooters, he moved to arizona after that and it hasn't been the same without my beerpong partner.

I've developed quite a bit of skill at the game(if I do say so myself), and I can hold my own with any partner now. the only problem is that all of the heavy hitters are already teamed up with the same people they always play with hoping to one day top the glory of team soto-j-rizzle's streak. it won't happen(more grudging feelings). the only people I usually end up playing partners with now are the less experienced players or those left without permanent teammates. not that I have any problem with that, it's just I usually top out at about 3 or 4 games before getting pwned. and you lose that team dynamic when you don't have an official partner you bring to the party to just dominate with.

I've had a few glory runs with chris johnson, but he's officially partners with medina. at kegs and eggs(oh, another blog) this year we had 2 games on the streets downtown in the middle of the crowd. I ended up playing the role of mr. clutch and saving our team by making all of the opponents cups both times we had redemption shots. legendary. and then there was another party we won by circle of death 5 times in a row. needless to say we had no more challengers.

I guess most people don't put as much thought into their beerpong teams, but I take it very seriously. this game is one of our groups most appreciated past times, (if you hadn't seen the picture post a few weeks ago of the fancy table we built, you should.) and it's necessary to take it seriously.

I miss soto. I miss the way the game was played once upon a time.

j-rizzle, beerpong hall-of-famer...